THAT IS PRICELESS

Charles van Beveren, Belgian

“Hey, Don’t Look at Me — I Wanted To Play the Flute. But My Academic Advisor Said This Stupid Thing Would Get Me Into Stanford,” ca. 1840

Oil on panel

Giovanni Segantini, Italian-Austro-Hungarian

Mary Had a Little Lamb. And Also a Bit of an Attitude Problem, 1892

Oil on canvas

Lovis Corinth, German

The Artist Liked the Idea of Using a Wind Machine With His Models, But Clearly He Was Going To Have To Adjust the Power Setting, 1911

Oil on canvas

Jacob Adriaensz Backer, Dutch

“There, I Think I’ve Now Managed To Shake All the Pizza Crumbs Off My Collar. You May Resume. And Maybe Next Time We Don’t Break For Lunch Until After,” 1636

Oil on canvas

George Gillis Haanen, Dutch

After an Hour of Listening Intently To No Avail, Ingrid Was Starting To Wonder If Maybe This Wasn’t an Audiobook After All, 1834

Oil on panel

Raimundo de Madrazo y Garreta, Spanish

“Dear Resident of Apt. 205: Being New to the Building, We Understand That You May Not Be Familiar With the Condo Association’s Noise Ordinances. However, My Husband and I Both Have To Get Up Early For Work. As Such, We Ask That You Please Refrain From the Harp Playing Between the Hours of Midnight and 5 A.M. Or at the Very Least, Unplug Your Amp. Thanks!” Jill and Tim, Apt. 105, Date Unknown

Oil on canvas

Charles-Melchior Descourtis, French

“Shhh, Just Pretend We Don’t See Them. I Guarantee Our Clothes Aren’t Going Anywhere. I Hid an Exploding Dye Pack in My Underpants,” ca. 1798

Oil on canvas

John Riley, English

“Aha! So It’s True, Grandmama! You ARE Trying Out for the Quidditch Senior League!,” 1686

Oil on canvas

John Mackie Falconer, American

Ken Was Bummed To Discover That Most People Don’t Dress Up For Presidents’ Day Anymore, 1851

Watercolor