THAT IS PRICELESS

Arthur Trevor Haddon, British

“Dude, Relax. Nobody‘s Staring at Your Wife’s Ass,” Date Unknown

Oil on canvas

Arthur Trevor Haddon, British

“That Guy I Went Out With Last Night? On His Profile, He Calls Himself a ‘Maritime Navigational Engineer.’ Turns Out That’s Code For ‘Gondolier,'” Date Unknown

Oil on canvas

Friedrich von Amerling, Austrian

“Hey Friedrich, Why Is It That Every Time You Paint Me, My Face Is in the Dark? Ever Hear of a Ring Light?,” 1838

Oil on canvas

Willem van der Vliet, Dutch

“This Is So On Brand For You, Jasper. You Knew We Were Robbing the Bank Today. How Could You Forget Your Mask?,” 1627

Oil on canvas

Charles van Beveren, Belgian

“Hey, Don’t Look at Me — I Wanted To Play the Flute. But My Academic Advisor Said This Stupid Thing Would Get Me Into Stanford,” ca. 1840

Oil on panel

Giovanni Segantini, Italian-Austro-Hungarian

Mary Had a Little Lamb. And Also a Bit of an Attitude Problem, 1892

Oil on canvas

Lovis Corinth, German

The Artist Liked the Idea of Using a Wind Machine With His Models, But Clearly He Was Going To Have To Adjust the Power Setting, 1911

Oil on canvas

Jacob Adriaensz Backer, Dutch

“There, I Think I’ve Now Managed To Shake All the Pizza Crumbs Off My Collar. You May Resume. And Maybe Next Time We Don’t Break For Lunch Until After,” 1636

Oil on canvas

George Gillis Haanen, Dutch

After an Hour of Listening Intently To No Avail, Ingrid Was Starting To Wonder If Maybe This Wasn’t an Audiobook After All, 1834

Oil on panel