Eugène Devéria, French
“Sorry About That. My Cell Reception Is Terrible Out Here, So Now I’m Calling You Back On My Handline,” Date Unknown
Watercolor with gum arabic over traces of graphite on wove paper
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Info, and perhaps links pointing to more info, about this artist can be found here, here (archived if necessary), here, here, and here (can be read in full for free on Fridays), perhaps in addition to what’s in his Wikipedia page (Google translated French Wikipedia page has more).
/// She seems innocent, honest and sweet,
as she waits on that ornate stone seat.
With her hand to one ear,
she is straining to hear
the soft stealthy approach of men’s feet.
/// Built-up earwax has been interfering,
so it seems as though she’s hard of hearing.
To err is just human,
but clear that cerumen,
digging into your ear’s not endearing.
/// That lone Woman who sits in a Bower
has been Seated there one quarter hour.
She is here to sell six
smuggled (scarce) condor chicks,
hidden in that hat marked with a flower.
/// She’d been asked also for a bald eagle,
even though all such sales are illegal.
“Endangered rare birds”
to her are just words.
Doesn’t care how protected or regal.
/// They are birds (and not bees) in her bonnet,
so it’s likely they’ve left droppings on it.
How to clean her chapeau
I’ve got no room to show;
it’s a limerick, not a long sonnet.
/// This Miss needs to pee so bad it hurts,
yet encumbered by so many skirts
she can’t get to a spot
that’s secluded to squat,
so she labors to hold back the squirts.