
Édouard Vuillard, French
“This Is Certainly One of the Most Impressive Resumes I’ve Ever Seen, Mr. Ferguson. Though I’m Not Sure How Being the 1928 Armpit Fart Regional Champion Will Help You Manage a Bank,” 1930
Oil on canvas

Édouard Vuillard, French
“This Is Certainly One of the Most Impressive Resumes I’ve Ever Seen, Mr. Ferguson. Though I’m Not Sure How Being the 1928 Armpit Fart Regional Champion Will Help You Manage a Bank,” 1930
Oil on canvas

Mary Cassatt, American
Mother Teaching Daughter the Most Flattering Angle To Take a Selfie, ca. 1905
Oil on canvas

Edmund Birckhead Bensell, American
Another Painting By That Dude Who Sucks At Drawing Faces, 1878
Chromolithograph

Charles-Édouard Boutibonne, French
A Croquet Match Between the Sisters of Edgeworth Manor, Two of Whom Showed Up Drunk, 1871
Oil on panel

Giovanni Battista Moroni, Italian
Even at Their Tender Age, It Was Clear the Girls Had Inherited Their Mother’s Eyes and Their Father’s Hairline, ca. 1572-75
Oil on canvas

Augusta Lebaron-Desves, French
When Coca-Cola Appropriated St. Nick For Its Advertising, the Coffee Industry Struck Back With a Jolly Christmas Character of Its Own: Sanka Claus, 1843
Oil on canvas

Per Krafft the Elder, Swedish
“Here’s How This Works: If I’m Pleased With Your Portrait, I Shall Leave This Lever Just So. However, If I Am Displeased, I Shall Pull Said Lever and Drop You Into the Fetid Sewers Beneath the Castle. But the Important Thing Is To Have Fun With It,” ca. 1767
Oil on canvas

Adolphe-Alexandre Lesrel, French
“We All Got One of These After That Naval Battle We Lost To the Spaniards. I Think Our Captain Called It a…’Participation Trophy?,'” 1906
Oil on panel

Lucius Wolcott Hitchcock, American
When the Lumberjack Jobs Dried Up, Paul Bunyan Shaved His Beard and Became a Dermatologist, 1911
Oil on board

Frans Moormans, Dutch
Thanks To His Father, Henry’s Attempt at Romance Was Cut Short. But Don’t Feel Too Sorry For Him. Back in the 17th Century, This Was Considered Third Base, 1867
Oil on canvas