Author: Steve Melcher

Henry Andrews, English

“Hey, I Was Just Being Chivalrous. That Wedgie Wasn’t Going To Dislodge Itself,” 1857

Oil on canvas

Nicolaas Pieneman, Dutch

Rembrandt Looking at Porn (For “Research Purposes” Only), 1852

Oil on panel

Antonin Hölperl, Czech

“You Jackass. That’s Not What I Meant When I Asked You To Bring Me My Glasses From the Kitchen,” Before 1888

Oil on canvas, laid down on board

Laurent de La Hyre, French

Putting a Woman on a Pedestal: Step 1 of 4, 1635

Oil on canvas

American Lithographic Co., N.Y.

“Ohhh, You Have a Pet Pir-AN-ha. LOL, I Thought You Said I-GUA-na. What? I’m Sorry — I Can’t Understand You When You’re Frantically Pointing at the Water and Shrieking Like That,” 1900

Lithograph

Louis-Léopold Boilly, French

From the Discontinued IKEA Items Catalog: the Beåvørskrübben, ca. 1790

Oil on canvas

James Lobley, English

When His Gamekeeper Returned Home Empty-Handed After Yet Another Hunt, Lord Bentley Began To Question His Decision To Hire a Vegetarian, ca. 1873

Oil on canvas

De Scott Evans, American

“It’s Called a ‘Clock,’ Honey. It’s What People Use To Tell Time When Their Phone Battery’s Dead, Their Cable Box Is Off, and They Can’t See the Microwave,” 1881

Oil on canvas

Nicolas-René Jollain, French

“Not That I’m Complaining, My Lady, But When You Said You Needed Help With Your ‘Toilet,’ I Kinda Thought I Was Coming Up Here To Jiggle a Handle,” ca. 1780

Oil on copper

Henri Gervex, French and Alfred Stevens, Belgian

“Excuse Me, Guys. Am I Correct in Assuming We’re in a Portrait of the Most Prominent Painters in 19th-Century France? Or Is This the Line For the Men’s Room?,” 1889

Oil on canvas