Author: Steve Melcher

Horace Vernet, French

“Captain, I Think This Is the Beginning of a Beautiful French Ship,” 1841

Oil on canvas

Joseph Anton Koch, Austrian

“So, This Is the Second Circle of Hell. It’s Reserved For Liars, Thieves, and People Who Pronounce the ‘T’ in ‘Often,'” 1823

Pen, ink, and watercolor on paper 

Philippe-Jacques van Bree, Belgian

“Honey, You Can’t Go Out in Public Just Wearing That. Here — Put This On,” 1833

Oil on panel

Carl Daniel Freydanck, German

“…18 Bedrooms, 14 1/2 Garderobes, and Best of All For a Family With Teenagers Like Yourselves, It’s Zoned For a Dungeon,” 1838

Oil on canvas

Johan Gustaf Sandberg, Swedish

Swedes Being Taught How To Dab, 1836

Oil on canvas

Johann Jacob Mezler, German

Why the Next Time You Get Shot By Cupid’s Arrow You Might Want To Get an Antibiotic, 1834

Oil on panel

Karl Kollmann, German-Russian

General Sükhbaatar, Mongolia’s Best Hope For Gold in the Javelin, 1828

Watercolor

Carl Blechen, German

“Relax, Amy. It’s Just Some Followers of ‘That Is Priceless.’ Trust Me — We Don’t Have Anything They Haven’t Seen Before,” ca. 1830

Oil on canvas mounted on plywood

Philippe-Jacques van Bree, Belgian

“So Tell Me. What’s a Nice Girl Like You Doing in a Genre Painting Like This?,” 1861

Oil on panel