Simon Besanger, Dutch
When Edna’s Primrose Polished Off Its Third Pitcher Before Lunch, She Knew It Was Time To Confront It About Its Drinking Problem, Date Unknown
Oil on canvas
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/// Gerda checked whether someone could see
where her chamber pot contents will be.
She has no indoor loo
so the sly thing to do
is to “water” those flowers with wee.
/// She’s not sure what those flowers might be.
That they’re dying she’d have to agree.
Gerda learned that she can’t
fertilize a strange plant.
This is certainly not a sweet pea.
/// In the past, out her window she’d throw
nightly waste to the street down below.
She found that it mattered
when people get spattered;
they don’t care how bad you had to go.
/// Neighbors don’t yet suspect what she’s done,
(pouring piddle on plants has been fun).
Is she selfish? Perhaps.
But there’s no moral lapse
to be taking care of Number One.