Thomas Sully, American
“Oh Hey, I Was Wondering Where You Disappeared To. Please Tell Me You Didn’t Just Give My Paperweight To That Douche George Washington,” 1809
Oil on canvas
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/// Gilbert Stuart, the portraitist, chose
how each POTUS he painted should pose.
He did James Madison,
but, alas, only one.
Thomas Sully would paint more of those.
/// The fourth President stood five feet four,
shorter than leaders since or before.
Sadly, in voters’ eyes,
one trait sought is great size,
8and yet James proved, at times, less is more.
/// It was Madison who set his sights
on amendments, and he won those fights.
Constitutional law, he quite rightly foresaw,
needed tweaking: our great Bill of Rights.
/// James was small— measured just five foot four.
(Shorter than leaders since and before.)
Sadly, in voters’ eyes,
the Best Man links to size,
POTUS four proves, at times, less is more.
/// Founding Father, this man oversaw
that we’d have Constitutional law.
Plus amendments. His fights
forged the great Bill of Rights.
Checks and balances— feature, not flaw.
/// Revolution was based on one thing.
We would govern ourselves, no more King.
Rule of law, not of whim,
else our prospects grow dim,
and the Presidency means “Ka-ching!”
/// That which some voters deem “Presidential,”
is more likely just self-referential.
With whom would they drink beer?
The same church? Groups they fear?
Brains and ethics are just not essential.