Edmund Charles Tarbell, American
“Gretchen Didn’t Care. She Was Wearing Her Favorite Hat To the Movies, and Anyone Sitting Behind Her Could Suck It,” 1907
Oil on canvas
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Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here, here (archived if necessary), here, here, here, here, here, here, here (can be read in full for free on Fridays), here, here, and here, perhaps in addition to what’s in his Wikipedia page.
/// In Preparing for the Matinée,
Charlotte Barton primps for the ballet.
Large fur hats were quite common
for this young Boston Brahmin;
in her box seat she’ll be on display.
/// Charlotte used to have thick waist-length hair,
but she had it cut short on a dare.
She regretted it, so
returned to status quo.
Shorn mane’s now a chapeau she can wear.
/// When she saw how her new hat impresses,
Charlotte gathered her left-over tresses.
She’ll pay experts to weave
the locks into short-sleeve,
but elegant hair-shirt-waist dresses.
/// She’s aware hair-shirts will cause severe
itch and rash to the skin it comes near.
So she’ll have them designed
to be expertly lined.
Outside: sackcloth, Within: soft cashmere.
/// Road kill perched on the head may smell funny,
but it’s fur that won’t cost any money.
Her ensemble’s complete
with what’s worn on her feet:
Bunny slippers of actual bunny.