Carl Goebel the Younger, Austrian
“My Wife Wants To Stick This Thing By Our Pool. Can You Guys Give Me a Hand Getting It In My Volvo?,” Date Unknown
Watercolor on paper
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Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here (Google translated), here (if truncated, can be read in full for free on Fridays), and here (Google translated), perhaps in addition to what’s in his Google translated German Wikipedia page.
/// In the Garden of Great Schönbrunn Hall,
the civilians all seem strangely small.
Asked one soldier, “Who’s seen a
larger marble Athena?”
All the soldiers are two meters tall.
/// In this scene is a glaring detail
which, if graded, would merit a “Fail.”
Goebel’s use of perspective
isn’t true or effective.
Distant figures are not drawn to scale.
/// In reports, those who saw it allege
there’s a statue that stands at the edge
of tall bushes, well clipped.
But what gardener’s equipped
to trim growth from a three-story hedge?
/// Yet one more thing Carl misrepresents,
are their shadows, so long and intense,
which are cast by the sun.
At odd angles, they run
to coverge, which just makes zero sense.
/// Artist Goebel is no threat to Titian,
and the large statue’s model was Grecian.
Gardener fell from the ladder,
battered, bruised and much sadder.
Topiary would not reach completion.