George Dunlop Leslie, English
“No Ma’am, I Did Not Spit in Your Tea This Time. Wow, You Are Never Going To Let Me Live That Down, Are You?,” 1865
Oil on canvas
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/// The new serving girl heard her decree:
“Set two places for Afternoon Tea.
Place the newspaper there
on my late husband’s chair,
and pour rum in the cup served to me.”
/// Madame stared into Bridget’s green eyes.
“It appears that we wear the same size.
I have suitors with needs.
Put on my ‘widow’s weeds’
and we’ll give old Lord Grey a surprise.”
/// There’d been rumors about the late master.
Siobhan told Bridget how he’d harassed her.
It was said Madame lied
about how he had died.
Bridget played the part Madame had cast her.
// When Lord Grey came to call the next week,
they relied on a time-worn technique.
Tea with strong rum was laced;
his eyeglasses “misplaced,”
and young Bridget, in black, didn’t speak.
/// She was wearing the Madame’s perfume.
The few candles could not cut the gloom.
Soon his Lordship’s attack
had the maid on her back.
In three months, Madame had her next groom.