Joseph Badger, American
Hannah Had Learned She Could Make an Awkward Portrait Session Fly By If She Smoked About a Pound of Weed First, ca. 1746
Oil on canvas
Follow That Is Priceless on Social Media and GoComics (the Link button):
Click to Follow This Blog or Share This Masterpiece:
Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here, here (archived if necessary), here, here (can be read in full for free on Fridays), here, and here, perhaps in addition to what’s in his Wikipedia page.
/// Mrs. Richard Kent (née Hannah Gookin),
in her day was considered good lookin’.
Despite “resting bitch face,”
her full bust and slim waist
could have helped her earn big bucks by hookin.’
/// After drinking a bottle of brandy,
the “good parts” of the book make her randy.
She’s a large woman, (hefty),
and, it turns out, a lefty.
So at D.I.Y. Hannah is handy.
/// Her limp head cloth is somewhat askew,
and her blouse, (showing cleavage), is too.
The dark sky has the form
of a gathering storm,
and her eyes can’t quite focus on you.
/// It seems clear that she won’t be proceeding
with completing the book she’d been reading.
Though she’s holding the place,
you can tell by her face
that her mind has been dulled by inbreeding.
/// The weird lighting is so atmospheric
that her pallor looks green and vampiric.
Hannah’s vapid expression
could give one the impression
that she’d died. Or is Badger satiric?
/// It is said Hannah started to cry
when she saw how she’s shown by this guy
who depicted her face
with complete lack of grace.
It was Joseph she’d been badgered by.