“It’s Okay, Girls. But I Think We’ve All Learned a Lesson About Name-Calling Today. Where Did You Ever Hear of a Word Like ‘Feckless’ Anyway?,” Before 1886
“Frankly, Young Lady, I Could Give a Rat’s Ass How Gordon Ramsay Says I Should Make a Pancake. Now I Suggest You Shut Up While You Still Have Enough Teeth Left To Eat It With,”Between ca. 1790 and ca. 1810
“Prithee, Dear Colleagues, Let Us Return To the Matter at Hand: Are Selena and Justin Truly Back Together, or Are They In Fact ‘Just Good Friends’? I Move For a Vote,” 1863