Author: Steve Melcher

Artist Unknown

“Oh, Good! Gatsby Just Brought Out the Pickleball Rackets. Shall We?,” 1926

Illustration

Gerard Thomas, Flemish

“I Know It Looks Weird. I Asked Her If She Wanted To Postpone To Some Day Her IBS WASN’T Acting Up, But She Insisted,” 1700-10

Oil on canvas

Artist Unknown

“I Appreciate You Wanting To Give Me a Nickname, Lady, But ‘Horny’ Isn’t Really Working For Me. And I’m Not a Big Fan of ‘Unic’ Either,” ca. 1510

Oil on canvas

George Wesley Bellows, American

Matilda Didn’t Mind When Stanley Went on His Long Fishing Trips, Because His Wax Figure Was Actually a Better Conversationalist. And, Yes, the Sex Was Better Too, 1924

Oil on canvas

Edvard Bentzen, Danish

“I Love Love LOVE That Dress, Mommy. Unfortunately, I’d Have To Eat Nothing But Strained Peas For a Month To Fit Into It,” 1861

Oil on canvas

Albrecht Frans Lieven De Vriendt, Belgian

Count Baldwin II, Cleanup Hitter for the Antwerp Astros, 1889

Oil on canvas

Herbert James Draper, British

Resistance Training, Circa 1200 B.C., 1909

Oil on canvas

Augustus Egg, British

“So Does This Mean I’m a Knight Now?”

“Oh No, That’s a Different Sword. I Just Forgave Up To $10,000 of Your Student Loans,” 1857

Oil on canvas