Author: Steve Melcher

Jacob Jordaens, Flemish

Well, So Much For Dry January, 1640

Oil on canvas

Gustav Bernhard Österman, Swedish

You Always Know You’ve REALLY Pissed Eugene Off When Smoke Comes Out of His Nose, 1893

Oil on canvas

Marie-Thérèse Duchâteau, French

Hey, Is This a Painting By That French Artist Marie-Thérèse Duchâteau? Big Fan. 1893

Oil on canvas

Benjamin West, American-British

“Ma’am, I’ve Finished My Police Sketch of That Guy Who Stole Your Purse. Yes, I Know That Was a Month Ago, But I’m a Bit of a Perfectionist,” 1776

Oil on canvas

Jan Mijtens, Dutch

“I Know, I Know. But What Do You Want Me To Do? My Girlfriend Picked It Out,” 1661

Oil on canvas

Paul Fischer, Danish

“You Can Keep Searching Out There All Day, But Let’s Face It. Your Bikini Belongs To That Dolphin Now,” Date Unknown

Oil on canvas

Albert Guillaume, French

The Museum Tour Took an Ugly Turn When Victor Ripped One in Front of the Klimt, Date Unknown

Oil on panel

Camille Pissarro, French

Training For the Big County Fair Sack Race, Jackie Discovered a Unique Way To Reduce Wind Resistance, 1895

Oil on canvas