Carl Heinrich Bloch, Danish
Psycho Ex-Girlfriend Subtly Letting You Know She Found Your New Address on the Web, 1884
Oil on panel
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Info about this artist can be found in my comment at another blog entry.
After the Bath. A Young Girl Knocking at the Fisherman’s Window.
/// This odd painting’s long title is quirky.
Is the scene now explained, or more murky?
And which one of them bathed?
Will the girl be unscathed
for behavior so creepy and “lurky”?
/// The girl’s nail on his pane: tap, tap, tap.
Is he in that room taking a nap?
She peers into the gloom.
Will she enter his room?
And she holds what? A wet shower cap?
/// And, so, what can this mystery be?
Let’s assume that he bathed, and not she.
A wise fisherman wishes
to smell less like the fishes,
Soap and water will wash off the sea.
/// Now, perhaps he has very long hair,
and to look good it needs special care.
At his window she stands,
their bath cap in her hands,
to return the protection they share.
/// She taps and peers in, but where is he?
(If he wants the cap, better get busy.)
He appears— but too late.
The poor fisherman’s fate
is to sail off with hair that’s all frizzy.
/// This girl at the window in pink
may not be the intruder we think.
Perhaps she’s been locked out
of her home, by the lout
who is in her house, passed out from drink.
/// She is tapping to find the loose pane.
By removing it, entrance she’ll gain
to her home where she’ll tell
her ex-boyfriend from Hell,
“You can’t claim ‘Squatter’s Rights’ to remain!”
/// The girl in pink hasn’t forgotten
how he’d stuff his ears tightly with cotton
to ignore what she pled
when he took her to bed.
This is Denmark, and he is what’s rotten.
/// Back inside, the girl vented her wrath.
(Greater fury, no netherworld hath.)
Then, his fatal mistake:
“Baby, for old time’s sake,
take your dress off— let’s both take a bath.”