Stanislav Feikl, Czechoslovak
“Hmm. I’ve Put On My Dress, Done My Hair, and Picked Out My Jewelry. But Darn It, I Feel Like I’m Forgetting Something,” 1925
Oil on canvas
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Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here (Google translated), and here (Google translated), perhaps in addition to what's in his Wikipedia page (Google translated Czechoslovakian Wikipedia page has more).
/// Jana’s flesh, said the painter, is pearly
like the necklace he gave her. So, surely,
the ideal Christmas gift
was herself (it showed thrift).
He was so thrilled he unwrapped it early.
/// And yet, Jana was often distracted.
She zoned out when she should have reacted.
She would pause at the sight
of things shiny and bright,
unaware of the leers she attracted.
/// But the artist, a Czech, didn’t mind.
It’s to sight and to touch he’s inclined.
He was not one to balk
because Jana won’t talk.
That would not make him leave her behind.
/// So now Jana’s a girl of the arts,
who succeeds with her own kind of smarts.
She’s accomplished her goal.
She now knows, on the whole,
she’s not greater than some of her parts.
/// Once, her charms had been put up for bids,
but time passed and her fame “hit the skids.”
Though she sags and gained weight,
she is happy that fate
gave her breasts better use— feeding kids.
/// To distract him, at cards with her spouse,
with cologne, her nude bosom she’d douse.
But she soon understood
that, no matter how good,
her one pair didn’t beat a full house.