MASTERPIECE #2991

Gerard Thomas, Flemish

“I Know It Looks Weird. I Asked Her If She Wanted To Postpone To Some Day Her IBS WASN’T Acting Up, But She Insisted,” 1700-10

Oil on canvas

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mabrndt
mabrndt
2 years ago

Other than that provided by or pointed to by his Wikipedia page, I couldn’t find any online info about this artist.

Solstice*1947
Solstice*1947
9 months ago

/// When her portrait’s displayed on a podium
she”ll be subject to much public odium.
Gerard Thomas first swore
she’d be famous and more
as a spokesmodel selling Imodium.

/// With her queasiness on full display
(diarrhea that won’t go away),
her high status is such,
that she’s dressed like the Dutch,
showing off that she’s had a ruff day.

/// On display here is more advertising.
Other art with commercials disguising.
There’s the couple who feed
their pet “Flanders’ Bird Seed,”
and a dress to be worn when baptizing.

/// But the artist whose work is on view
was embarrassed by what he must do.
That his worries might cease,
when one spoke of this piece
one should call it “Attributed to…”

/// Still, scatology has its adherents,
which explains the form’s long perseverance.
On TV writing staffs
poop and farts still get laughs
despite censors and their interference.

Solstice*1947
Solstice*1947
9 months ago

/// When the artist gets payment will matter.
Should he paint what he sees or just flatter?
More commissions won’t come
unless painters “play dumb.”
Patrons never grow older or fatter.

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