Michael Ancher, Danish
“There’s No Sense Taking a Fishing Boat Out in Weather Like This. So What’ll It Be? Singing Drunken Sea Shanties or Some Grand Theft Trawler V?,” 1915
Oil on canvas
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/// Skagen fishermen, dressed for a storm,
stand inside close to noon when it’s warm.
On these bright, sunny days,
out the window they gaze
at the beach where the pretty girls swarm.
/// They mean well, but they couldn’t be dumber.
Jen prefers they keep far away from her
since the time that they said,
(and it filled her with dread),
“Hi, we both know what you did last summer.”
/// Both admire the same girl, young and “dishy,”
so they stare from afar and both wish she
would date much older guys,
but in Jennifer’s eyes
when she sees them she thinks, “Something’s fishy!”
/// Ogling ladies through windows for kicks…
these two sailors are up to old tricks.
They know from seafood feasts
fish are slippery beasts,
yet they’ll claim, unashamed, that fish sticks.
/// Oilskin clothing repels H2O,
from the waves or a hurricane’s blow.
But they’re going to get
at least partially wet
if they sweat or their bladders o’erflow.