Evelyn de Morgan, British
Open Auditions to be the New Starbucks Logo, 1886
Oil on canvas
Follow That Is Priceless on Social Media and GoComics (the Link button):
Click to Follow This Blog or Share This Masterpiece:
THROWBACK THURSDAY: MASTERPIECE #1530 (9/6/16)
Info, or perhaps links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here, here, here (can be read in full for free on Fridays), here, here, here (archived, if necessary), here, here, and here (archived, if necessary), perhaps in addition to what’s in her Wikipedia page.
/// Sailors drawn to Sea Maidens bemoaned:
“Mermaids do not have sex, they are cloned.”
Since their human half halts
half-way down— no assaults.
(Their fish half can’t be easily boned.)
/// Mermaid eggs don’t require fertilizing.
Daughters look just like Mom— unsurprising.
This explains, once again,
why there are no mermen.
They’re all sisters with none “supervising.”
/// Lusty sailors thought, “Kids? I want none.
There are other ways we can have fun!”
But they never had much.
‘Maids are cold to the touch,
like a corpse which has never seen sun.
/// These five sisters are one mermaid troupe,
yet the fifth drifts away from her group.
An identical clone,
she is never alone,
but aspires to be out of the loop.
/// She had met a man— fallen in love,
but he lived on dry land up above.
Sea Witch gave her a choice:
for warm legs trade your voice.
There were downsides she’d never thought of.
/// It turned out the man wasn’t so nice.
She could not speak of her sacrifice.
He took a human bride;
Mermaid chose suicide.
Turned to sea foam— the ultimate price.
/// These five mermaids just rose from the sea,
yet their hair seems dry— how can that be?
Wet hair usually clings
to the head in long strings;
but their scalps exude grease. That’s the key!
/// They had tried wearing clamshell brassieres,
but could not figure how shell adheres.
Clearly, stockings or shoes
are things they’d never use.
Shirts of seaweed spawn spectators’ sneers.