Carl Holsøe, Danish
“B*tch, I Know You Can Hear Me. So Are You Going To Get Me That Cracker or What?,” Date Unknown
Oil on canvas
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Info, or perhaps links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here, here (archived, if necessary), here, and here, perhaps in addition to what’s in his Wikipedia page (Google translated French Wikipedia page has more).
/// Helle sits in her chair disengaged
and reflects upon how she has aged.
She was free in her youth,
but admits, now, the truth:
like her house plants and parrot— she’s caged.
/// Through her window this rare sunlight streams.
She positions her face between beams.
The habitual gloom
has departed her room,
but inside Helle silently screams.
/// Her bright garden is verdant with spring.
It should cheer her and make her heart sing,
but the husband she hates,
all her choices dictates,
and she cannot control anything.
/// Seeing Helle, the parrot expressed
words intended to make her depressed.
It was trained to repeat
cutting comments which beat
down the self-esteem she still possessed.
/// From the bird she heard constant abuse;
her vile husband’s taunts he’d reproduce.
Now her morbid reflections
were on her imperfections,
and she pictured that tree with a noose.
/// She’d been courted because she is rich
by a man who, with words, could bewitch.
Their religion, of course,
forbade seeking divorce.
Now she’s trapped in a death-us-part hitch.
/// This grand house that they live in was hers.
It’s the lifestyle her husband prefers.
While she stares at four walls,
he’s out playing with “dolls.”
Tawdry “Venuses” eager for furs.
/// When they first met he lived in a garret.
Helle had wealth; he wanted to share it.
He’d been charming. They wed.
Now he wanted her dead,
so he plotted a murder by parrot.
/// Helle’s husband trained two matching birds.
One to parrot his “Kill yourself!” words.
And the other would speak
of sweet things in tones meek—
the embarrassing love talk of nerds.
/// On the day that his death-plan succeeds,
he’ll inherit the money he needs.
Helle hanged from a tree
will set Parrot 2 free
(while the weaponized Parrot 1 bleeds).
/// When his wealthy wife’s death hits the news,
the police and reporters may choose
to accuse him of lies,
but he’ll have alibis,
(if the two birds he doesn’t confuse).
/// To be wealthy and stay out of jail,
his slick murderous plot mustn’t fail.
He’ll switch parrots to hide
how he urged suicide,
since a dead bird cannot tell the tale.
/// So, “What happened?” the reader may wonder.
Did his trained bird drive her six feet under?
Helle’s faith, very strong,
tells her suicide’s wrong.
Maybe that is his first fatal blunder.
/// All the awful things said by the bird
might, by others, have been overheard.
Has she no friends or kin
who might sometimes drop in?
I’ll let you, reader, have the last word.