Cornelis van der Voort, Dutch
“Very Funny, Honey. But Not What I Meant When I Told You To Grow a Pair,” 1620
Oil on canvas
Follow That Is Priceless on Social Media and GoComics (the Link button):
Click to Follow This Blog or Share This Masterpiece:
MASTERPIECE #3003
Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here (archived if necessary), here, and here, perhaps in addition to what’s in his Wikipedia page (Google translated Dutch Wikipedia page may have more).
/// Henrik had a big speech to prepare.
Some quotations would give it some flair.
Juul said Bartletts, that’s where!
You’ll find every quote there.
He now thinks she did not mean the pear.
/// Many lads’ ideal shape for a lass
is a figure that’s called “hourglass.”
Large bust and a small waist
aren’t to Henrik’s taste.
He likes pear-shape girls with a big ass.
/// Women’s clothing back then was complex.
Henrik couldn’t see Juul’s glutes or pecs.
If you think that was bad,
you should really feel bad
for Dutch males who craved long swanlike necks.
/// Men viewed faces and hands, at the best.
Heavy clothing obscured all the rest.
Those “neck-men” had it ruff.
Can’t view girls in the buff.
How she’s built, a girl’s suitor just guessed.