George Baxter, English
“All Right, We Saved Your Ass This Time, Higgins. But From Now On, No More Walking and Texting,” ca. 1855
Illustration
Follow That Is Priceless on Social Media and GoComics (the Link button):
Click to Follow This Blog or Share This Masterpiece:
Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here, here (archived if necessary), here, here, here, here, here, and starting here, perhaps in addition to what’s in his Wikipedia page.
/// The Ascent of Mont-Blanc through a pass
halted when Higgins hit a crevasse.
He’d have fallen for sure,
but his rope stayed secure.
Three men pulled him up, saving his ass.
/// When he slipped you could hear Higgins bellow.
He was frightened of falling. This fellow
screamed so loud as he cried
that it caused a snow slide.
Higgins, like all their leggings, was yellow.
/// The group’s clothing is foolish (or bold).
They refused to wear what they’d been told.
No fur parkas in sight
they would freeze overnight;
insufficiently dressed for the cold.
/// They are stylish, on that we agree,
but how practical? That’s hard to see.
Those straw hats stoke my fears
they have frostbitten ears.
Of survival supplies they seem free.
// Do these “swells” have some means to make camp?
Picks and hammers to fasten a clamp?
When the wind turns intense,
can they shelter in tents,
and build fires when they’re frozen and damp?
/// It’s been known to occur now and then,
the “removal” of unwanted men.
For a total erasure
drop him into a glacier,
and you never will see him again.
/// So, was Higgins pushed by the men near him?
If that’s true, he has reason to fear ‘em.
Second push might succeed.
To survive he would need
some of Captain America’s serum.
/// When those fictional foes fiercely fight
on Swiss Alps ‘til they fall out of sight,
it is kill and be killed,
and the readers are thrilled,
but Holmes somehow survives. Am I right?
> or <
/// Eighteen guys comprise some of the folks
who call warming a “Liberal Hoax.”
Like the frogs in a pot
slowly made very hot.
When it boils every frog in there croaks.
> or <
/// On Mount-Blanc, yodels from far-off mothers
were: “A Little Old Lady Who” Brothers
with us yodeled right back,
which dislodged a snow pack
on a little old lady (who smothers).