Jean-Baptiste Regnault, French
“That Sucks That Delta Lost Your Luggage, Theseus. While You’re In There, I’ll See If I Can Round You Up a T-Shirt and Shorts,” Date Unknown
Oil on panel
Follow That Is Priceless on Social Media and GoComics (the Link button):
Click to Follow This Blog or Share This Masterpiece:
Info, or links that point to more info, about this artist can be found here, here, here, here, here, here (can be read in full for free on Fridays), and here, perhaps in addition to what's in his Wikipedia page (Google translated French Wikipedia page has more).
/// Because Athens had suffered defeat,
they were forced to send off their elite—
seven lads, seven maids,
(a fate no one evades)—
to King Minos’ maze down in Crete.
/// This time Theseus took on the chore
to be one of those pris’ners of war.
Ariadne then saw
this young man (in the raw),
who’d be slain by the fierce Minotaur.
/// They both stood at the labyrinth’s door.
Ariadne reached out to implore,
“My bull-headed half-brother
(we both share the same mother)
is within, and your body he’ll gore!”
/// “My new helmet’s expressly designed
with a point which has focused my mind.
A thrown stone will resound.
When the beast turns around,
with my head down, I’ll charge from behind.”
/// She fell hard for this lad, brave and strong.
If she saved him, would that be so wrong?
A sharp sword to attack;
ball of twine to get back.
But would Theseus string her along?
/// She assumed she would be Mrs. “T,”
but on Naxos she’ll meet Mr. “D.”
She will wed Dionysus
(despite all of his vices),
leaving Theseus all out to sea.
/// Way back then, in King Minos’ time,
the “elite” were the best; they were Prime.
But to some folks today
in the U. S. of A.
you would think they’d committed some crime.
/// If we don’t halt this dire “dumbing-down”
of our land, once a place of renown,
“Idiocracy” rules
o’er a nation of fools
who’ll be led by a clown with a crown.